愛 の 戦士

So I start back at school this week; a little bit crazy to me. It feels like it's been forever since I've been to a real school. Hopefully this time I don't mess it all up :3 I'm thinking about getting a new laptop that's smaller and easier to carry around while I'm there, we'll see. Maybe I can get it and send my big clunky one in for repairs since I .. broke the d key off. I've been copy-pasting it for so long now it's unfortunately become habit. Oh yeah, and the sound doesn't work and it's all scratched up from my horrible treatment of electronics. Poor thing.

The boy and I are going to Dragon*Con next weekend, how exciting!! Getting to see people I haven't seen in a long time and just nerding out are top priority, plus the people-watching will be top notch, as always I'm sure.

We are finally all moved in to the new house. Well, except my bike and some TA-50 is still at the apartment .. I have to get a new bike rack for my car and pick those things up. The cats settled in pretty fast, Jose had a bit of a freak out and hid under the couch for a while, but they're all good now. The couches are new, the tables are new, the knives are new and very sharp (oww), donated bookshelves are lovely. It feels nice to have a place of my own instead of one that sometimes felt just worn in and gross with someone elses person. Throwing some of those things away over the past few days felt lovely (especially the smash when they went over the balcony).

So, all in all, it feels like my life has settled down finally. Guess that means while it's resting, it's time for me to get some things done like the degree and some unpacking.

Yesterday I got the greatest phone call ever. $42K a year to start with, full benefits, 4 days a week, 10 hours a day. And they want me to start the beginning of next year. All I can say is PHEW, to all the fears of financial insecurity. These part-time shitty jobs I've been trying out can eat a dick. I have enough money to last me until the end of this year, and now my sleep won't be hindered with the feeling of impending doom that's been hanging over my head for the past few months.

Now we can start looking for a house. One with room for a dog and the two cats, one where I can paint the walls green and purple and blue, one where I can hang a hammock outside and sleep.

i may have wasted all those years
they're not worth their time in tears
i may have spent too long in darkness
in the warmth of my fears
and as I walk through all my myths
rising and sinking like the waves
with my thoughts wrapped around me
through a trial of tears ...

to be engaged soon?

eep, still have to finish packing, then I'm going back home to Bear :]

see you soon! <3

(stupid beerstein: check!)

Surreal moment: Watching Dora the Explorer in the chow hall with 30+ other soldiers. what. the. fuck.

Time to go! <3

My time here is almost done! Never thought I'd be so excited to leave Germany, but here I am, and here's how I am. Tomorrow we're going on an MWR (Morale-Recreation-Wellness) trip to the Dachau concentration camp .. and shopping! How American, I love it. Speaking of 'lovin' I also heard that they built a McDonald's in front of the concentration camp, so now I need a picture of this. Can anyone confirm/deny these rumors?

After I get home, I'll have a whole week or so there, then it's off to Charleston, SC for two more weeks of fun. Argh, my unit tried to send me to PLDC (primary leadership development course) instead of to this SC trip. Oh hell no. I'm not ready for 2 more weeks of what amounts to basic training all over again just yet. I have a whole year after getting my E-5 (SGT) to go to that shit.

I tell myself it's all worth it. I'm going to Dragon-Con in about a month, I'll have money there, and it will be glorious. At least so the people I'm going with tell me :] Very very excited.

Just want to say thank you to some certain stupid fucks who made me feel so much better about my life just by being the fuckups they are. Thanks! <3

Another day passes in Germany. I have guard duty in less than 2 hours. All I wanted was to go to Amsterdam and Berlin, see some family. But no, we get restricted to base. Feel like a little kid again. I almost understand why people smoke. I have to stop, it's all I do on guard duty. The beer here is fantastic. Maybe I'll go out after duty. But there are no German guys. Just nasty German girls and the same old American guys. Not interesting. Not hot. Go away. The Canadian guys were cool, I drank a beer with them. But they're all officers. They do what they do, forget the enlisted guys.

I still need a vacation after this. I'll be in Charleston, SC for a while after I get back from Germany, but if it's anything like this, I'm using the money I make, fuck off school for the Fall and am just going somewhere.

There is a weird-ass music video on right now, the language is grating, but the animation is too cute. It's like those dolls that Asian girls love to make and put on their xanga/livejournal came to life and are chanting in German. Weird.

Time to take a shower and get ready for 8 hours of fun with one guy I don't know and one guy I wish I didn't.

Another summer day
Has come and gone away
In Paris and Rome
But I wanna go home

I may be surrounded by
a million people
I still feel all alone
I just wanna go home
Oh I miss you, you know

And I’ve been keeping all the letters that I wrote to you
Each one a line or two
“I’m fine baby, how are you?”
Well I would send them, but I know that it’s just not enough
My words were cold and flat
And you deserve more than that

Last minute trip to Germany! Leaving on Wednesday, coming back on the 28th. Gonna have to stop the low-carb thing for a bit I guess .. but it's German beer <3 So it's okay.

After I get back from Germany, I'm going on AT with my unit to Charleston for 2 more weeks. I hear it's a lot of fun there, so I guess I'm getting my vacation. (? sorta.)

Today we did some mock prisoner control and I got some minor heat exhaustion. Me + hot weather = bad things. Guess it was okay because they got to run a "what if?" type of thing. Tomorrow is some diagnostic PT action before leaving for Germany. Have to find things I need to see while there.

Melatonin gives me the most vivid dreams sometimes. Now I feel sick, because the dreams I had last night/this morning are making me sick to my stomach.

In one, I volunteered to deploy to Kuwait so I would get out of serving in Iraq for my first rotation, but that got turned down and I was sent as an NBC NCO to Iraq with a part of the 2nd Ranger Bn. I know it doesn't make any sense now, but that still scared the crap out of me as I was dreaming it.

The second, I got shitty news from an uncle of mine that my father had pretty much killed himself with alcohol while in Paris. Then I felt even shittier because I haven't been able to call him or get in contact with him via anything since I got back from Missouri. But I know my dad isn't drinking anymore, so that exact thing isn't worrying me. Still need to get in contact with someone from New York.

The third is one I shouldn't have had, it was meant for someone else. I mean that in the dream, I wasn't me, but someone else. Too bad for him.

( Motivation mumble .. )

Portable WoW on Monday <3

Government sponsored "vacation" next week, hurray! I get to use and/or watch demonstrations for all the "next-generation" weaponry that's being introduced to our military.

I'm super excited and I want to eat a cheeseburger :]

My finals are all over this week, then this vacation is all next week, then Eric-bear is visiting. Superrr :) We finally get to go to Xing's!

emoticons and exclamation points are the bestest <3

I suck at firing the M16, what a worthless "soldier" I am :x

Hopefully I'll pass this weekend. Bivouac too, I have to find a lot of things that I guess I need for this. No contacts, gotta get my glasses fixed.

Firing left-handed makes me go almost blind by the end of half of my qualifying round because of the gas shooting right from the ejection port into my face. (Remember to bring eye drops)

My good point for the week, hurray for new laptop coming soon :]

Hello from beautiful SC :)

Almost done with chemical school, hurrah! or is that hooah? argh, anyway.

There are many scantily clad college students wandering around with green beer, must resist staying here, i have to study for my test tomorrow :(

Hopefully next year I can spend my Spring break someplace nice. <3

Leaving for chemical school tomorrow, getting a head start today (1 whole hour closer, wee). Be back in 2 weeks if all goes well.

Who thought it was a good idea for me to drive to this place with directions that only get me to AROUND where this place is instead of explicit even-nariko-can't-get-lost kind of directions? I'll be sad if (when) I can't find the place and then I don't get to go to school :( I have a phone number with no name attached but I also have a phobia of talking to people over the phone that I don't know. This could be bad ..

Oh, this is where I get to spend my spring break too.

We better be going someplace fun for AT this summer :/ (c'mon Germany!)


(I have enough METAL to last me seven trips there and back, thankfully.)

v v v bah bah bah

Oops, I knew I forgot to do something important ..

Gotta drive to Bragg to get name tapes for my uniforms since I'm leaving for chemical school in 3 days, eep! :X

I'm an idiot.

I'm dying laughing here ..


Hi Sugar,

Let's say it's Thursday night at midnight. I spot you down at the cereal aisle examining a box of Coco Puffs. Maybe they don't serve these in the army.

Yes, I'm curious. So I follow and kind of glance from afar. You make your way to the meat section. It's bright as day under the fluorescent lights, but there's hardly anyone around. It's the best time to be in the supermarket. You can take all the time you want and no one cares.

I take a deep breath, slam my shopping cart into yours, and when you look at me aghast, I feign exasperation, point to one of my wheels, shake my head and say, "damn, can't ever find one with four good wheels."

Then I glance over the contents of your cart and say, "looks like you're shopping for a feast..."

What would you say?


You know, I really don't know.

Graduated CLC the other day .. my arm is still purple from where my IV partner messed me up :]

I kept my eyes open for a sternum rub too. Ouch.

omg, my most favoritest Gatorade flavor in the world (Lemon Ice) has been reincarnated as Gatorade Lemonade. It's the best ever, I'm so happy.

It was a good distraction while I was at the laundromat because the machines here are broken :(

And then two of my favorite 80's songs came on IN A ROW (Tiffany - I Think We're Alone Now and Bon Jovi - Living on a Prayer).




(I bought World of Warcraft and I am ashamed that it rocks my world.)


TIME FOR METAL.

I KNOW for certain that people collect these things, but I can't sell this guy for anything. The "antique" places near here won't even look at my Tigger because they're very "reputable" and do not deal with "children's things". Maybe they think I have a Tigger plush that I got when I was a child, therefore it would obviously be practically worthless. But this is from the 1930's, handmade, handpainted, all that happy horseshit.

Anyone know anything about antique toys or know someone that does?


Back to packing my shite up for CLC this weekend :]

I got my letter saying I was accepted for the CLC (Combat Lifesaver Course) training happening this coming weekend in Mississippi. Wish I had gotten a little prior notice, but I guess it's not too bad to miss 2 days of class to do some cool training like this.

(I'll probably look like a drug addict with all the track marks I'll have on my arms after this.)